Cold Dead World

(This one is back to more of my regular writing style, however the one main difference between this and most of my other works is that this has verse, chorus, verse type of structure to it. This is the first time I've tried it. I'm quite proud of it, but I'd really like to hear how you all think I did with it)

I am but a spectre,
A ghost,
A shell of a man,
No life of my own.
I have no say in where I go,
I have no thought of what I do,
Just go about my days,
According to what others say.

For I am caught inbetween,
A world so cold,
And a world so dead,
Trapped so far that it would seem,
A rock and a hard place would make,
For a life serene.

Even though I'll do what others will ask,
I'll always find time to fill my flask.
Always there to numb the pain,
Have just enough and it will keep me tame,
Add a little more and it warms the soul,
Just like a hearth burning through coal.

For I am caught inbetween,
A world so cold,
And a world so dead,
Trapped so far that it would seem,
A rock and a hard place would make,
For a life serene.

Push all others in my life away,
Just to save them from feeling my pain.
Intended to help them heal and mend,
It causes more hurt to them instead.
Lash back out at me, they don't understand,
My mouth and mind cannot obey their demands.
All that knows this way that I feel,
Are this book, this cigarette, and this whiskey that burns.

For I am caught inbetween,
A world so cold,
And a world so dead,
Trapped so far that it would seem,
A rock and a hard place would make,
For a life serene.